Tuesday, March 12, 2013

the hidden language of hugging

I first titled this post "the science of hugging," but there are no actual statistics or biological facts in this post. However, it is backed up by a lot of field study, so I still like to think that's like science.

Relevant side note:

There are different kinds of hugs.

I once had a guy inform me that every hug has a specific meaning. Depending on the way a girl hugged him, he could decipher if she was digging him. Basically, this is the hidden language of hugging, according to my friend:

1. The one arm over, one arm under.
Meaning: You're just friends.

2. The side hug.
Meaning: You're DEFINITELY just friends.

2. Girl's arms under, guy's arms over.
Meaning: She's more like a little sister to you.

3. Girl's arms over, guy's arms under.
Meaning: It's go time. In his words, her pretty face is "all up in your grill."

Do I agree?
Not entirely, actually. I would say #1 and #2 might be accurate, but maybe not the other two. The thing is, sometimes guys are tall. And then it's entirely unfeasible (and awkward) to go for method #4 without finding the nearest curb (or bench) (or trampoline) to stand on. (I take it back, I think a trampoline might cause facial bruising and I can't be responsible for your shenanigans.) 

Besides, I feel like every guy I've dated has had a specific preference between method 3 and method 4. I can see this becoming a thing: "Did he hug you?" "Yes." "And?" "Method 3." "Oooohh..."

My true feelings: you've got about 0.00005 nanoseconds to make this decision when it's hugging time. That's a lot of pressure and analyzing to put on something that allowed little-to-no prior planning. I tend to default to #3 and, noooo, that doesn't mean I want to be everyone's little sister. So gosh, let's not read too much into this, right?

I don't know, what do you think?
p.s. let's focus on the hugging meme in this post, because it's relevant and makes me laugh.

18 comments:

Unknown said...

I had a girl in the ward get after me for hugging method 2 on Sunday, but that was the exact message I was trying to send to her.

What does it mean if your mom only side hugs you? Unlovable troll???

Anonymous said...

I agree with you on this one for the most part!

Annie Citrine said...

Jeff and I do both. I would say girl over guy means kissing and guy over girl means a long, comfy hug. The first two are spot on, though.

Alicia Snow said...

Haha hilarious! The science of hugging is very important. I'm glad you've taken the time to analyze this.

Elisabeth Gee said...

Personally, I LOVE the backwards hug. When the boy puts his arms around you from behind. My fav. But obviously, you'd only ever use this if you were dating. Otherwise, #awk.

Becca Swindlehurst said...

I agree with the above post by the wonderful Elisabeth! Gotta love the backwards hug, but yes only if you are dating or potentially dating. I also love Method 4 when the guy is a bit taller and I have to go on my tiptoes. I just think it is cute :)

I'm glad to know these wise ways though! I know a few people who really need to get the Method 1 and 2 memo for sure...ha ha Love it!

katilda said...

Elisabeth, I have been laughing for a good while today about the idea of someone random coming up to me at a party and giving me a backwards hug. bahaha

Anonymous said...

hehe I would have never guessed there's so many different hugs and meaning behind them. That's why i'm not a hugger. :)

Unknown said...

Being as short as I am (barely 5' 0") I definitely don't get to be the over very often. I don't mind Method 3 because it usually feels comfortable. And I feel safe. But I also do love Method 4 because its flirty... Definitely more reserved for dating. I agree that you have such a short amount of time to make a decision! It's hard! I hope I haven't ever turned off a really great guy by my lack of hugging skills! hahaha

Unknown said...

How funny! I am not sure what I think, but I did enjoy reading this post. ;)

katilda said...

Hahaha. Maybe this language only applies in romantic situations...moms don't count?

katilda said...

I am glad to have your support, haha

katilda said...

I agree. I do both in dating, depending on what outcome I'm looking for. bahah

katilda said...

Someone had to do it!

katilda said...

Truth: Sometimes I get nervous and side hug a guy I like. Then I'm like, "WHAT HAVE I DONE."

katilda said...

Haha I'm totally not a hugger either! Here's a list of people I like hugging: 1. Significant other. 2. A good friend I haven't seen in a long time. And that's all. haha

katilda said...

I once dated a guy who is 6'4 (ok I did that twice) and I am only 5'6. The arms around the neck thing only ever happened if there was a convenient park bench nearby for me to stand on. haha

katilda said...

Mostly I think we're probably all overthinking it. haha