Once Upon a Scottsdale

Sultry beginnings to some very intriguing novels?

No…Just a couple excerpts from the past week of my life. Enjoy.

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Their attention was diverted from their plates of hash browns by a raspy voice from the next booth over. “Hey kids,” the bronze 60-year-old cougar hollered, and proceeded to flex her impressive biceps through the tight sleeve of her leather jacket. “Been weight-lifting for 31 years.” It was then that they noticed the crowd of massive bodybuilders who had been slowly filling up the empty tables at their local iHop, and they knew something momentous was about to begin.

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She knew it would be another fruitless Valentine’s Day when it began with seeing a dog get hit by a car and a pre-teen boy mooning traffic from the side of the road.

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“How did I get here?” She wondered, almost aloud, as she stood on the court in her green jersey and watched the opposing team come barreling toward her. “I don’t even play basketball.”

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She blamed the candid boy at the pulpit for making her laugh too loudly in church that day, as the congregation whispered, “Did he just say bromance?”

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“Of course,” she thought, as she tripped up the concrete steps with her arms full of basketball gear. Her life flashed before her eyes as her face and elbows hurtled directly toward the unforgiving stone surface.

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And…..why not an ending to wrap things up:

She turned the key and opened the mailbox with anticipation in her heart, daring to hope that this would be the day. The Best Buy package awaiting her eager grasp was almost surreal, as she sprinted toward her apartment with all five seasons of Saved by the Bell gripped firmly in her hands.

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Tune in next time for another edition of “Eloise in the Plaza.”

I mean, “Katie in the Loop 202.”